Friday, July 3, 2015

Live IUI # 3: How Many Sperm???

Happy Friday Joy Chasers!  I know that being a mother will come with some unique challenges that I cannot even imagine at this stage of my life.  I would like  to think that as I go through this trying to conceive process I am being prepared for parenthood.  Things don't go as planned and are often stressful.

Last week I shared my plans for my 3rd IUI.  I also shared how this IUI was already starting out on the wrong foot with miscommunication with the clinic and feeling unsure about how the timing was going to work out.  Well I had the IUI and things continued to go NOT as planned.  The video below is of me getting the IUI.  Pay attention to the conversation I am having with the doctor in the beginning.  Spoiler Alert! The sperm count was low!!!!

 I left the doctor's office so disappointed.  The sperm count was less than half of the amount guaranteed by the bank.   IUI #3 is the most stressful one so far.  After the insemination I started praying and hopping that this cycle would show evidence of God's sense of humor and irony.  Maybe the cycle where everything goes wrong will be my lucky cycle.  But before we find out we must wait, as in the two week wait.

Thursday, July 2, 2015

For Me, She Left Pray

A couple of weeks ago I wrote about how I am making room for baby literally.  I am moving out of my bedroom into another room so that I can use my current bedroom for a nursery.  My furniture will be delivered today so I am almost done redecorating my new bedroom.  Yesterday I put up a few accessories including the word PRAY.   I felt so good to finally have found a home for this word.  I posted on Instagram and Facebook exactly why I was pleased to have found a home for pray.  Here is what I posted:
I once knew a lady named Rebecca. She was one of the founding members of my book club. I did not know her well. I knew her as well as I could know anyone that I saw only once a month for about 3 hours. I may not have known much about her family, friends, or hobbies (other than book club) but I knew her heart. She was kind, funny, thoughtful, and genuine. I learned in time that she was also strong as she continued to cheerfully participate in book club while fighting cancer. Rebecca sadly passed away.
Not long after her passing one of her close friends brought me the word pray that you see pictured. She told me that Rebecca wanted me to have it. My name was even written on the back.
No one had ever left me anything before. Even when my dad passed away there was nothing specifically left by him for me. I was surprised and touched. Clearly Rebecca had learned a bit about my heart as well over the years. She understood my faith in God and belief in the power of prayer. I was also a bit dumbfounded over the gift as I had no clue where to put it. For a couple of years now I have kept the word prayer in the same shopping bag it was given to me in sitting in the corner of my living room.
Recently I have been doing some redecorating. I have been creating a bed room for myself that will be a place that is soothing and reflective of my personality. In this newly decorated space I have finally found a place worthy of Rebecca's gift to me. These letters now reside above my closet door. I will see it daily and remember the power of prayer and the kind spirit of Rebecca.
Has anyone ever left you something in their will?  Do you have any home decor items that hold a special place because of who gave the item to you?

Monday, June 29, 2015

Have A Joyfully Safe Summer

June is almost over.  Before you flip the page on your puppies and kittens hanging calendar ( I know I'm not the only person who has one) let me remind you that June is National Safety Month.  I am reminding you because I want all of us to have Joyful summers without any mishaps.  Plus, I was not even aware that it was National Safety Month until I received a reminder email from the good folks from the Mesothelioma Cancer Alliance.  
It is Monday, so I know many of you are writing out to do lists and updating your tasks with your goals for the week in the spirit of Make It Happen Monday.   Here are a few safety tasks to add to your list. 
  • Check your smoke and carbon monoxide detectors.
  • Check the screens in your windows and doors to make sure they are secure and don't have any wholes (especially if you have a cat like mine who has been known to scratch his paws on the screens).
  • Check your gutters.
  • Clean the filters in your air conditioners.
  • Check all of  your power strips, outlets, and surge protectors to make sure none are over loaded.
  • Brush up on your pool and swimming safety guidelines.
  • Stock up on sunblock.
  • Make sure you are up to date on your routine car maintenance especially if you see a summer road trip in your future.  
The Mesothelioma Cancer Alliance created the info-graph below with a few other ideas on how to stay safe this summer.

What safety tasks are you adding to your list?  What tasks do you do each year to ensure you'll have a joyfully safe summer?

Friday, June 26, 2015

Baby Making Update: A Bumpy Start to IUI #3

IUI Artificial Insemination

If at first or second you don't succeed try and try again.  That's what I am doing.  My first and second IUIs were unsuccessful so I am trying again.

This trying to conceive thing is no joke.  All of my initial testing came out good so I expected to get pregnant on my first try.  When that one failed I was sure the second one would be a success.  Now I am realizing there are no guarantees.  Regardless of all of the advances modern medicine has made in the field of fertility there odds of getting pregnant via IUI are not that great.  It is all in God's hands.  I just hope that the plans that I am making and God's plan for me line up really soon.

Here is the plan for my 3rd IUI.  Things got off to a bumpy start

Monday, June 22, 2015

Finding Joy On Father's Day After Losing Dad

Yesterday was Father's Day.  It was a good day for me.  Not because I did anything special (I went to church and started painting the room  that will be my bedroom in a couple weeks, remember I'm making room for baby). Yesterday  was the first Father's Day since my dad died where I did not feel depressed.

My dad died almost 6 years ago.  It has been one of the hardest  things I have ever experienced.  I'm sure anyone who has lost a parent can relate.  Each Father's Day since had been excruciatingly painful. I'd see the date on the calendar  and dread it.  I'd fast forward  through the Father's Day commercials and feel my anxiety  rise knowing the day was coming and how sad I'd feel.  When Father's Day would get here, I would post on Facebook  about how wonderful  my dad was then I'd  avoid  social media the rest of the day. The photos of my friends with their living fathers made me feel envious, sad, and a little angry.  I would  not even wish my brother or my friends happy Father's  Day.  If I could not tell my dad Happy Father's day  I damn sure wasn't saying it to anyone else.  This is what my grief was like even just last year.

This year was different.  I still miss my dad terribly and I did miss him a little more on Father's Day.  However, the dread, envy, anger, anxiety, and intense sadness were gone this year.  I was actually  able to enjoy seeing pictures of my friends with their dads on Facebook.  I even  wished My brother and a few friends Happy Father's Day.

Grief is no joke!  It is different  for everyone  and every circumstance.   I am happy that over the last almost 6 years the haze of grief for my dad has slowly cleared.  This  year it cleared enough for me to see Joy on Father's Day.

If you are struggling with grief I hope this post gives you hope that it does get better in time.  Although you will always miss your loved one and your life will be forever altered by their absence you will eventually experience joy again.

How was your Father's Day? Did you post a picture of your dad online? If so share your link in the comments so I can see it.

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